I would like to share with you about “expectations.” I would “expect” a lot from others and myself. I would be disappointed if I did not do something that I thought one way, and it didn’t turn out and then beat myself up.
I would “expect” a lot from others and when they didn’t do it on my time schedule, I would yell at them and punish them in some way. I would say to them, “But, you knew what I expected you to do…and I meant now.” So many confrontations because of my expectations. Non-verbal expectations at that. Maybe you have unrealistic expectations also. Because there are realistic expectations.
It took me to get to Al-Anon before I learned about my unrealistic “expectations.” Al-Anon taught me that I needed to verbalize what I wanted done and when, and then leave the results with them.
I learned here than an expectation is a premeditated resentment. I learned to catch myself when I was on my way to an expectation and to be more kind to myself. Also to lighten up. Al-Anon really is a way of life.
I must keep attending meetings and call my sponsor to help me sort out what is really going on. I cannot expect from other people. Especially if I did not verbalize it.
Won’t you join us at the CAPsell building? We meet in conference room “C” every Tuesday at 6:30 p.m. on Main St., Wautoma, and every Monday at noon at Hope Lutheran Church, Wautoma. See you there?
Peace, Debbie W.